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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27214129">you say you love me to death</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/sammyspreadyourwings/pseuds/sammyspreadyourwings'>sammyspreadyourwings</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>my precious bird of myth (how can you spread your wings) [8]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018), Queen (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Fallen Angels, Angst, Arguing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fallen Angels, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Multi, Permanent Injury, Religious Conflict, Religious Content, Worried John Deacon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 08:33:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,904</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27214129</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/sammyspreadyourwings/pseuds/sammyspreadyourwings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“Careful, Bri,” John says, “you’re going to hyperventilate again.”</p><p>“Is that what happened?”</p><p>“I suspect it was the shock,” John replies.</p><p>“Oh. Yes. I was thinking it was because everything was fine and dandy – but you’re right, I think it’s the shock.”</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>John Deacon/Brian May/Freddie Mercury/Roger Taylor</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>my precious bird of myth (how can you spread your wings) [8]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1956025</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>you say you love me to death</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Angel John!</p><p>Prompt: 'You have to explain some things to me before I go out of my mind.'</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>John strokes his wings idly. Brian is unconscious a few meters away from him, and while he is worried about losing time in tracking down where the angels have taken Roger and Freddie, he can’t drag Brian around with him while the guitarist is unconscious. Well, he thinks to himself, he could but humans tend to get upset about waking up in places they hadn’t been when they went to sleep, and it’s a bit rude to leave Brian in the proverbial tree trunk while John goes off on his own.</p><p>His wings flex and he winces because he knows in the past he would have done exactly that. Now he is worried about Brian’s injuries, he healed what he could but things caused by angelic power can rarely be healed by angelic power. He supposes it makes sense – it would stop some angels from regrowing Fallen’s wings – which meant that Gabriel had something to with Roger and Freddie being targeted. They’re far from the only Nephilim on Earth and he would say this is targeted towards him he knows angels aren’t revengeful only vengeful.</p><p>The vision might also be why he supposes, but then they would have acted to guarantee it. Instead, they left Brian alive – a little broken – but nothing he can’t recover from. John grimaces, nothing he can’t physically recover from. The human doctors will probably be able to fix the damage that is left in his knee. He doesn’t know what they can do about the hearing, though.</p><p>Brian stirs. His fingers flexing and he reaches up to tug on one of his ears, as he often does whenever he ends up with an ear infection from swimming. John shifts a little, flexing his wings back in a weak attempt to hide them. Hopefully, they won’t be the first thing Brian sees.</p><p>He hears a groan and he shifts to a kneeling position. His wings flexing in anticipation. Brian drags his hand down from his ear to over his face and then pushes himself upright. John leans forward as Brian pries his eyes open. Wide hazel eyes look around before landing on him.</p><p>“Are we on a roof?”</p><p>John nods.</p><p>Brian lets out a hysterical little giggle before falling back to the roof. The gravel crunches underneath his back. Both hands are against his face and John watches as Brian’s breathing rate picks up again.</p><p>“Careful, Bri,” John says, “you’re going to hyperventilate again.”</p><p>“Is that what happened?”</p><p>“I suspect it was the shock,” John replies.</p><p>“Oh. Yes. I was thinking it was because everything was fine and dandy – but you’re right, I think it’s the shock.”</p><p>John’s wings flick a pebble as he pulls them around him.</p><p>Brian pries his hands away from his face and tilts his head to look at John.</p><p>“I need you to explain things before I go out of my mind.”</p><p>He rolls his shoulder, “where would you like me to start?”</p><p>“How you aren’t dead? You were in the studio, but you have wings so maybe you did.”</p><p>“No. I had wings before… I lost them… and now I have them again but I can’t die. Not like humans can I was lucky in the collapse with how the debris fell.”</p><p>“Oh sure. Wait, humans?”</p><p>“Did you think I was still one?”</p><p>“Why can I hear?” Brian says instead, pulling on the same ear as before, “I couldn’t before and I think whatever happened in that room happened but I couldn’t hear before.”</p><p>“You heard Enochian, the language of angels and mortals aren’t meant to hear or understand it so it tends to,” John clears his throat, unable to say the words, Brian is lucky he is still sane.</p><p>“And I healed you, but no one could repair it fully.”</p><p>“So what? You left one completely deaf?”</p><p>“I thought that might be better, I could heal both partially or one completely,” John replies, “and I healed your leg, which was much easier.”</p><p>Brian bends the leg from before, “none of this is an explanation. Why do you have wings? You’re an angel I guess but what is with the explosions and enochians – where are Roger and Freddie?”</p><p>“Enochian, it’s a language.  And heaven wants them for a prophecy – I was trying to stop from happening.” It is easier than explaining that Brian needs to be dead for the prophecy and it is the truth.</p><p>“Right. Okay. Yeah, I see what heave would want with two members of a rock and roll band.”</p><p>“They’re special.”</p><p>“Thank you, John. Very enlightening!”</p><p>“Would it help you if I explained everything? I would think that you like keeping your world view as is, your science.”</p><p>“Science is real,” Brian says harshly, “this is – somehow – science-based.”</p><p>“So, you want me to explain?”</p><p>“No, John, I want you to continue to be a cryptic bastard.”</p><p>John sighs, “Brian I don’t want to upset you further.”</p><p>“Too late,” Brian snaps.</p><p>John hates the silent anger that Brian has. It is difficult to deal with because Brian digs his heels in and won’t budge until everything has been properly reorganized in his head. He supposes he could keep talking and trying to calm Brian down but he doesn’t think that knowing that he is the abnormality in the band would help – not to mention the recent development with his health.</p><p>While it would have been rude to carry and unconscious Brian around or to abandon him without a word, John doesn’t feel much guilt as he wraps a hand around Brian’s tense shoulder and flaps his wings once to reappear in their living room back in London.</p><p>Brian leans forward, panting harshly, “warn someone will you!”</p><p>“I didn’t think it would be so dizzying. I feel nothing when –” John closes his mouth.</p><p>“Why did you bring me here?” Brian scowls.</p><p>“Sigils of protection. Should keep most things out so long as you stay in. I have to find Roger and Freddie.”</p><p>Brian pushes himself into a standing position, closing his eyes against apparent dizziness, and he lifts his bad leg slightly to take the weight off of it. If Brian was perfectly healthy he might consider bringing him along but if Brian is alive the prophecy can’t happen, and he can rescue Freddie and Roger. This might be cruel though, he thinks he is judging by the hurt shimmering through angry hazel (it could be physical pain too), to leave Brian behind without answers.</p><p>John hasn’t explained a damn thing to him, and Brian deserves it. Knowledge is a curse though. He tilts his head, prophecies are tricky because they can happen with or without the knowledge.</p><p>“If you stay here – and stay alive,” John begins, “then I can more easily get the others back.”</p><p>“You want me to –” Brian starts to protest before wincing in pain and covering his ear, closing one eye.</p><p>John reaches out with one hand to coax the pain away. Brian stares down at where the palm is touching. Then ripping his arm away from John before stumbling back into their storage chair (miraculously clean for one) and steepling his head against his forehead.</p><p>Heaven moves in much slower seconds than Earth does – and while he supposes they could keep Roger and Freddie on Earth, why would they? They can survive the trip to heaven and no one being is foolish enough to storm the gates (not even John in his desperation to get his loves back). He needs a plan.</p><p>He needs Brian to not hate him.</p><p>“I will stay for an hour, that’s all I can risk,” John says, “if there were another way – but I will answer any questions you have.”</p><p>Brian looks up, the anger and the hurt are tightly woven in his expression and he drops his hands away from his face, leaning back in the chair.</p><p>“What does any of this have to do with us? Why did you not have wings before? Why are angels kidnapping people? What else have you lied about?”</p><p>That last question makes John recoil, “I never lied.”</p><p>“You never told us.”</p><p>“Would you have believed me?”</p><p>“I don’t think that is the point of confessing,” Brian says, “I don’t mean like at a church – that opens an entirely new line of questioning.’’</p><p>Something crosses Brian’s face. John doesn’t like that look and it makes him pull his wings back in response. It's heavy and it's dark and it reminds him of the time just before John made that deal with Death. Superstitiously he looks around but sees no cloaked figure. And perhaps that should stay secret, even if Brian would prefer the truth to be known.</p><p>“You know what – saving Roger and Freddie are the priority. Go.”</p><p>John pushes onto his feet, “Brian I…”</p><p>“You’ve said enough. Go save them and I’ll probably be here when you get back.”</p><p>“You can’t leave.”</p><p>“No, probably not. Not with my leg, leave me be John. I don’t want anything from you right now. There are more important things do to.”</p><p>“Brian!”</p><p>Brian moves just before John can grab him, and John has always wondered how Brian is so uncannily good at avoiding things he doesn’t want.</p><p>“No. John. The others are in danger. I’m safe in this house according to you – and I can’t do anything to help anyway.”</p><p>“You aren’t thinking the right way about this,” John says, “it’s…”</p><p>“I don’t think I can think ‘the right way’ about this,” Brian says hotly, his tone becoming nasally and in times before, this is when Freddie would step in and gently push them apart to cool down.</p><p>“I have too much to think about and you have other things you need to be doing and being away from you is going to do wonders for me,” Brian continues, “I want Roger and Freddie back, and you seem to think you can do that. So go.”</p><p>“Brian…” John flexes his wings out in panic cocooning them soft gray.</p><p>Brian looks less angry and more fascinated by the feathers, even going so far as to lift his finger to almost touch them. He stops centimeters away and folds his hands to his side.</p><p>“What do you want me to say, John? Wait around until I’m not angry with you? Frankly, we don’t have the time – Roger and Freddie don’t have the time. I don’t know why you’re sitting there trying to convince me to trust you again when the others are in danger.”</p><p>“Because,” John bites his tongue and then pushes through the hesitation, “everything I did was to keep you three safe and unaware and I don’t want you to hate me. They won’t hurt them because they need them.”</p><p>“Heaven help me,” Brian pauses as though the phrase tastes bad on his tongue, “I don’t hate you John, but I can’t trust you.”</p><p>John folds his wings back allowing them to droop in acceptance of Brian’s words. Humans aren’t like angels.  They take time to think through things, and Brian likes to think. That hurts the most, he thinks, John had forgotten that regardless of how much human culture he absorbed and adapted (and created through music) he is a fallen. There is a wall that can never be crossed.</p><p>He has to let Brian go so that he can get the other two back, except that John has never been good at letting Brian go.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Yeah. Well.<br/>Brian is having a rough time, he's a bit snarky too. Wonder what made him have such a sharp attitude change. Poor lad.<br/>John also doesn't know what is going one.</p><p>As always, leave your thoughts and comments below or come talk to me on tumblr!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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